Who Came Out With The Brilliant Idea of Throwing Mandarin Oranges in Chap Goh Meh?

If any of y'all get bored on the 15th day of CNY, there's a fun thing to do. What's fun ?

Answer : Throwing mandarin oranges into sea. Must be mandarin oranges, not Sunkist orange !

I did not know about this tradition before i came to the west. neither my parents know it though. So i did a little bit of research on this tradition. According to a newspaper report, "The romantic practice of throwing oranges on Chap Goh Meh did not originate in China but was a peculiar Penang tradition that began at the end of the 19th century according to local historians."

Ohhhh, i see.... In order to enhance your understanding, the tradition is actually about throwing of mandarin oranges into the sea by young Chinese maidens in search of suitors. They will write their names and particulars on the mandarin oranges and then throw them into the sea. The mandarin oranges will then flow flow flow and when a guy (hope that's a handsome one la) picked the oranges, the guy will contact the girl and let the story develops.

But my concern is that, why must it be mandarin orange ?

There's a saying that if you want a boyfriend with good skin, then you need to throw a smooth-skined mandarin orange. But when the time comes to the 15th day of CNY, most of the mandarin oranges have became like this :

Problem right ?

If the theory of throwing fruits will bring you a partner, then i have a lot of suggestions here.

Fruits that Girls should throw:

1. Durian

Reason ? King of Fruit mah. Can get some royalties wei. Don't you wanna buy pretty things without much concerns ?

2. Banana

If you wanna have a partner with long d*ck, then throw this. Hahaha

Fruits that Girls should not throw :

1. Rambutan

I don't advise you to throw rambutan if you have phobia of hairy guys.

2. Kiwano Horned Melon

Reason ? Cause it just simply looks like a dinosaur's body.

xxx

To make it fair, if guys would like to join the fun to throw fruits also, here are some tips for y'all :

Fruits that Guys should throw :

1. Mangosteen

Reason ? Queen of Fruits mah. Haiyo !!!

2. Watermelon

Despite of its size, it's advisable for guys because it sounds like "我的美人" (my pretty girl) in chinese.

3. Papaya

This is for guys who hope to get a girl with big boobies like Angelina Jolie.

Fruits that Guys should not throw:

1. Apple

Cause it sounds like "阿婆" (Grandma) in chinese. I bet you don't want your girl who looks like a nanny right ?

2. Pear

Guys, if you throw a pear, perhaps your girl will have a really huge butt, which is not that proportionate and fit the definition of HOT and SEXAYYYY !!!

xxx

If the saying is true, then next year i will throw a fruit during Chap Goh Meh with my name and account number on it. And i really need to throw it into the sea, not river or lake because i hope the fruit will reach either the States or Europe. Guys there are freaking HAWTTT !!! *drools*

Alright, that's all for this post. Will update ma blog once i remember the password again.

Chiao. =)

I So Freaking Like Jojo

2 posts in ten minutes.

Back to the topic. I fucking like Jojo lorrr. She started as a teen star and went into hiatus later (not really sure what had happened). I've listened to her songs back then and forgotten her during the hiatus. But after her release of her very own version of Drake's Marvins Room, I was like "OMFG!!! She's back !!!". This time, she's not a teen star anymore. She's a singer-songwriter now and hey, her songs are dope ! Although not much of her new songs are released officially, y'all can sense the maturity in her music. And she has dope vocal !!!

But seriously, she's so underrated. Well, what i could say is that "underrated artist makes the best music".

Check out the two songs below:

Disaster

In the Dark

Let's root for good music.

Billion Dollar Baby

Aloha peeps !!!

A month has passed. I was staying in my hometown for the past month, awaiting for CNY and nothing much.

I haven't make any new year resolutions yet. And i'm not really sure how many resolutions from year 2011 i've fulfilled. Well, i'm not going to make and list the resolutions just like previous year. What i'm going to do in this 2012 is, i'm going to focus more on myself; meaning that i'm going to place myself as the priority in making decisions. I don't wanna have any regrets because regret means not respecting one's decision that was previously made. I wanna be a BILLION DOLLAR BABY and live like a BOSS !!!

Anyways, CNY is coming real soon. Are y'all ready for the on-going CNY madness ? Hahaha

Love Peace and Hope.

Blog Tracker Is Funneh

Aloha ! It has been almost 2 months since i've updated this bloggie and well all sorts of reasons led to the hiatus.

Back to the topic. I've installed a blog tracker in my blog for a short while, just to track how googlers bumped into my blog, no other intentions. Although there aren't super duper lots of gila babi keywords there, it's still a fun thing to play on. And i gotta say, sometimes i don't even understand what people are searching about. So let me answer some of their curiousity la ya =)

It's only 2011, how would i know what part time job is available in 2012 ? Kampar doesn't have much part time job though...

Meiosis ??? Since when my blog became an educational blog ?

Answer : There will be a corpse wearing a pair of Loubi there. Get it ??

How to fuck laos student in class ? How does google know how to fuck someone leh ? Did you expect google will teach you how to fuck a person ? Porn site please... (but you still can go to that person and say FUCK YOU to him/her, simple).

Niaseng ! If G dragon is ugly, then i dunno how many human need to jump off from the rooftop then. Don't be jealous of this fine man...

"I fucking hate this class". Then what did you expect google to tell / help you ? Pathetic.

Double Niaseng! Which planet's language are you speaking ?

Triple Niaseng la ! I've only heard Char Siew Pau, Lin Yong Pau, Tau Sar Pau, but i have never heard of yit mun pau. What the fuck is that ?

This one really jialat lo, aiteilyiu. The rate of "William Hung" as a search keyword in my blog is super high lo aiteilyiu. Since when i've became asssociated with him ? Gross .

What is this again ? Accounting tutorial mun ? Did someone from Utar who happened to be in the same tutorial class as mine googled me ? No idea.


Luckily i haven't blog any porno or having some porno wordings in ma blog like MILF and etc, otherwise people will bump into my blog when googling it in the search engine and my blog will become a porn site. Then i will yell WTF !!! if my blog turned into a porn site. And luckily the political flavour of my blog is mild to none. I don't want to appear in Malaysiakini.

xxx

I'll be flying back to Sandakan to enjoy my 1 month holiday on this Thursday. I seriously, seriously hope that it will be a dope one this time. I don't want to be under the weather during this 1 month of break, although i'm kinda under the weather already. Symptoms....Fingers crossed.

Happy Holiday to y'all !!!

Applause Them For Giving Justice To Songs

1. Tablo

He's not the bubblegum type of singer. The lyrics of this musician reflect what's running in his mind, while discussing the society illness openly through his lyrics. His rapping definitely added spices to the songs.

2. Jay Park

He's no longer the idol who does everything told by the company. And now, he is the one who gives justice to R&B and Hip Hop. He may not be the best singer, but he has the power to make every song sounds like his own.

By the way, perhaps i sounded a bit serious above, unlike the usual blogging tone of mine. To redeem myself, look what i've discovered in Jay Park's Girlfriend MV....

Hahaha. I spotted a Andy Warhol's banana alike towards the end of the music video. People romantic romantic there but i suddenly noticed that balala lo. Coz me likey the Andy Warhol's Banana a lot lo, aiteiyiu. If i'm rich, for sure i will grab this piece of banana art home and hang in my living room. Same kind of banana, how come Andy Warhol managed to make it looks so yummeh looking but the others just look like mere balala...

Chiplak balala

No need i say la, the name is there...

There's a saying of "Same people, but different fate". Seems like the same thing applies to banana also; "Sama balala, different fate".

*** Andy Warhol, was an American painter, printmaker, and filmmaker who was a leading figure in the visual art movement known as pop art. Aiya..just ask uncle google if y'all wanna know more about Andy Warhol.

I Am Not A Christian, I Am Not A Buddhist, Then What Am I ?

I went out to buy alcohol something (cannot reveal here la, otherwise i'll be charged for violation of copyright, get it ?) this evening and on the way reaching the shop, i was stopped by two guys.

Guys : Hi.

Me: Smiled while giving a hand gesture to prevent them from future elaborations.

Guys: We are from Korea.

Me: Smiled again.

Guys: Are you a Christian ?

Me: Nope.

Guys: Are you a Buddhist ?

Me: Nope...and continued to walk away...

Do you know why i refused to talk to them despite they claimed that they are from Korea ? Firstly, i really don't like this kind of religion-spreading thingy going on. For me, it's up to a person to decide on what they wanna worship or to believe in. Matter fact if it's Christian, Buddhist, Muslim or Atheist, there's no need to do this kind of things to somehow "lure" a person to join the network. God's door is always opened to everyone of us. When the right timing arrives, there's no way to shut the door though...

Secondly, they two guys do not look like Koreans lo, i mean seriously. Although they are not those kinds of attractive guys whom we are so used to see on dramas or movies, i can tell they are not Koreans. Their english is not fluent, i can tell. But they are more looking like Chinese, i mean China Chinese. I think it's a scam, that's why i don't buy them. Walao, I'm so smart *wink*.

After i answered that i am not a Buddhist, i couldn't help but to laugh at myself. I asked myself, then what are you, Lee Yit Mun ? You atheist ah ? Then i got a click in my mind. "Oh ya. I worship Coco Chanel". BWAHAHAHA !!!

Coco Chanel is my goddess lo, aiteilyiu. Who says those females who love to doll up themselves are all bimbos ? Coco Chanel was damn smart lo, aiwarnyiu !!! I don't think there's any women out there who can beat her wisdom. Although Coco Chanel is no longer in the Earth, her sayings / quotes are immortal.

Beware of losing some brain juices and brain cells....

The one that cracked my head, and it's still cracking my head....

If you are same as me who still couldn't make heads or tails of this quote, Feel free to kill yourself please...

Most of them look simple, but do you 100% understand them, or at least one ?

That's the beauty of wisdom which i am hunting for the rest of my life. Coco Chanel, i salute you!!!

p/s : I am a Buddhist. I denied both Christian and Buddhist as i said earlier, just to rescue myself from the two chikopeks...

Kua Lan Jiong Punya Lecturer and Students

Hahaha. Here's another gila babi thing that happened to me this afternoon which i will feel guilty for not sharing with y'all.

It was the usual Business Ethics lecture class today and the lecturer hor, exposed the Accounting students to some designer brands wei; Kenneth Cole, Salvatore Ferragamo (aka Fat Let Gei Mou), Chanel, LV... The lecturer was so lan si with his possessions of some of his designers' items and lan si-ed that we Accounting boring ah chai and ah moi don't know what the heck he's talking about the brands, but everyone still enjoyed his lan si talks on these designers stuffs. Even i myself also excited lo, coz can you tell me if there's any lecturers who will talk about designer brands in lectures ? Perhaps no. Then everybody went jakun. I also went jakun. Hahaha.

But i really wanted to tell him to look for other designer brands lo. There are so many better ones. I felt like telling him "Hoi, Uncle...Look for Michael Kors la...or else John Galliano la. And don't wear Padini anymore la..Go look for Louboutin la..You so jakun meh? dunno all these ah ? And don't always LV la...if you come to my hometown hor, almost every pelarian also kiap a LV bag with them lo...Can you talk about Givenchy Nightingale ah ? So jakun meh ? "

Michael Kors watch

John Galliano Menswear

Givenchy Nightingale

Chanel 2.55

It's enough for a down payment for a house or car. Do you want it ? Yes babe

I believe that karma bites. So just now i said even pelarian also owns a LV bag right ? So if karma bites, it implies that i will own the pelarian bag some times in the future lo ? Actually, i don't mind to own one though...LV Neverfull please... *wink*

The only LV that i can tolerate

After gossiping about lecturer, it's time for my favourite; STUDENTS. My group let the lecturer to check our assignment draft mah. Then the other students went so jakun oh, coz we are the first group which managed to give him a draft to be diao-ed lo. (This lecturer has a habit of rejecting and diao-ing assignments, don't be suprised). So ebelibadi went a bit tensed lo, and surrounded my group and lecturer. The situation was like at those pasar malam stalls. Man ! I nearly wanna curse so much at that time because i thought i was going to die from claustrophobia. The students surrounded me that i hardly can breathe lo, aiteilyiu. I know the students' intention; to korek tips from us mah. But still no need to claustrophobia me lo, MY GOD !

And finally i got back the draft, a COMPLETE draft just like the original one, except with some conteng-conteng there lo. Then i left with my friend, and a student approached me to HAVE A LOOK at my draft wah. Kononnya have a look, but do y'all think i will believe her ? Why not i go to the printing shop and make a copy for you, want or not ? KI SIAO !!

Then Yilin met her friend and her friend asked her if our draft got TORN INTO PIECES by the lecturer !!! When Yilin told me the whole thing, i really cannot tahan myself but to yell "OMG ! SO DAMN KUA LAN JIONG lo". And laughed all the way until next tutorial. (kua jiong = exaggerating)

No need to ask la. Con-lan-firm is those students who surrounded us a while back then made a fuss about it, and add sambal belacan, cuka, kicap, tepung, gula and garam into the whole cerita lo. And they even told people that the lecturer "seksa" us lo. Hahaha. If they don't fucking LISTENED to what was really said by my group and my lecturer, please SHUT THE FUCK UP la. Pandai make stories nia. But not bad la, free jokes what. Who doesn't want ? But next time i want free boobies or free hunks la, can ? *teehee*

Skaligus i wanna say, SO KUA DAMN LAN JIONG lo !!! hahaha